For a split second, I think about calling S. to see what he is up to and then I remember that he more than likely will have his phone turned off, the feeling of disappointment I would feel if he had it turned off, the reason I called it quits with him: his lack of availability.
It’s quiet tonight. Tonight was one of those rare occasions in which I didn’t plan to do anything with my night! I got off work, did some packing up of the summer school classroom (last day tomorrow) to move back to my regular school year classroom, and drove about photographing the cloudscapes of the approaching thunder storm over the desert landscapes and onion fields. I got home around 3 and heated up leftover steak, rice and veggies for my lunch/ dinner in the microwave. I had a giant peach and a dark chocolate Klondike bar as well. I smiled at the luxury of the meal and then settled in for a long nap on the couch until shortly after 6PM. I spent a couple of hours cropping my photos I shot during the day and then opened the doors and windows of the house. The sunset was one of those spectacular pink glows after a cloudy day. I decided to sit and write / type about such a perfect evening while listening to the music coming from a neighbor’s garage, the occasional child and dog walking by outside and the ticking of the living room clock. The music from the garage has been turned off now and the outside world has darkened, the trees melting into the warm twilight.
For me, peace is a night of doing nothing in solitude with the summer breeze blowing through the door, the rare dry smell of rain and sounds of summer. What is peace to you?
Missed 6AM yoga in favor of more sleep. Missed 7PM yoga in an attempt to get a nap. The silence of my piano expresses my exhaustion. Only the sunlight and the breeze brings about a smile to my eyes.
Yesterday aide told me student did not have something in her backpack without looking and I took her word for it. Mother was forgiving and aide apologized to both of us for her assumption after I bought up the matter to her. Newest aide seemed uncomfortable. Today, she tells us she can’t lift due to multiple surgeries. After I tried to give her the lightest kids to work with without a successful outcome, I made the call to switch aides. I felt terrible even though it is much safer that we did this because I felt like it was almost age discrimination. She simply couldn’t keep up with the rest of us perhaps due to her age but I could not risk having our kids or her getting her hurt! I hope she is much happier in her new placement! Some of my aides stayed after work today to report some sexual harassment that occurred between the others. I intend to nip it in the bud first thing in the morning. I will simply pretend like I saw the whole incident and pull the perpetrator aside to speak with. To think, I’m a person who dislikes conflict!!!!!! The adults in my room are so much more work than my actual students!
My principal asked me to join the school leadership committee. I have never been asked to join at any of my prior schools and am happy to join. Part of me is in disbelief because I was the last teacher hired at this school and there are teachers on my team with far more experience and seniority. His explanation is that he values my input. I suppose I should accept this… My guess is also that he sees I am collaborative and is creating a new school culture by selecting an outsider as a leader as I am one of the the few who came from a different district. I am excited that I will be able to give my kids a voice as the students who cannot speak, as many of my students cannot, are often forgotten about during school decisions at many schools.
I stayed up late doing nothing and slept in and don’t even feel guilty about it! I’m smiling and happy for a nice long weekend at home!
Been doing non-student work days. Summer school starts on Monday! I haven’t taught summer school in four or five years and am excited to work with the kids and aides! Been spending lots of time on Pinterest for staff first day gift ideas and on Teachers Pay Teachers for all of their awesome ideas and activities. Summer school is right next to a peaceful park within less than a minute walk from the doorway of summer school classroom!
And now to attempt to satiate my photography addiction…
This has not been the most insightful posting other than being okay with being lazy and sleeping in! Haha! That’s pretty self-accepting. A perk to no kids, no family, no spouse, no pets… That’s something one can tell singles who wish their lives away hoping for date nights! You can sleep in! Haha!
This is why I left…you didn’t make time for me… Even now, you ask me to visit…to make more time for you. Time… Where does it all go? Slips on by like the starry night… You fall asleep and awake to find it all gone…like a distant memory that you could swear was just a dream.